Daily WHUFC News - 1st June 2012

Reid scoops All Whites awards
WHUFC.com
Winston Reid has been voted New Zealand Men's Player of the Year and
Player's Player of the Year
31.05.2012

Winston Reid ended a memorable May by completing a personal hat-trick of
awards. The West Ham United defender added to his npower Championship
Play-Off winner's medal by collecting the Nike Men's Player of the Year and
NZPFA Player's Player of the Year trophies at the 2011 New Zealand Football
awards. Just eleven days after helping the Hammers to defeat Blackpool at
Wembley, Reid was presented with the two gongs at a dinner held at Sky City
Hamilton on Wednesday evening. The 23-year-old, who was ruled out of the All
Whites' quest to defend their OFC Nations Cup title next month with a groin
injury, was voted Player of the Year by his peers in the New Zealand
football community and was picked by his team-mates to win the
Players'Player award. Reid has earned ten senior caps for New Zealand since
making his debut against Australia in May 2010. The centre-back excelled for
the All Whites at the 2010 FIFA World Cup in South Africa, scoring the
equaliser in a 1-1 draw with Slovakia as the Kiwis drew all three
group-stage matches to end the tournament unbeaten. This past season, the
Auckland-born player totalled 33 appearances in all competitions for the
Hammers, scoring three goals including a sensational winner against Millwall
in February.

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TC feeling positive
WHUFC.com
Tony Cottee thinks West Ham United's squad just needs some fine tuning over
the summer months
31.05.2012

Tony Cottee believes West Ham United already have the strong nucleus of a
squad as they prepare for life back in the Premier League. While the Hammers
may have set a new club record for most away wins in a season, Cottee knows
that tougher times may lie ahead next season. The former Englnd
international striker thinks that the majority of the Hammers squad last
season can cut mustard in the Premier League, but they will need additional
support to provide much needed strength-in-depth. "We have to build a squad.
With the demands of the Premier League you need two teams basically, with a
squad of 24-25 players that can play in the top league," he told West Ham
TV. "Sam [Allardyce] and Macca [Neil McDonald] have to sit down and have a
good think about who to keep and who to let go.
"The squad could shrink to 17 or 18 and its then it is up to Big Sam to
bolster the squad to about 24 players. We could do some with some back up in
defence and possibly another goalscorer."

Regardless of departures and arrivals, the former Hammer of the Year and
star of the legendary 1986 side that finished third in the league believes
everyone involved in the 2011/12 season can look back at their achievements
with pride. Cottee is hopeful that they can continue the same kind of
hard-to-beat mentality in the face of the greater challenges in the Premier
League. "The object was to get promotion and ultimately it doesn't matter
how we did it as long as we did. It's a long old slog 46 games and you can't
expect any team or player to play well in every single game so I expected
the dip and unfortunately the dip we had cost us automatic promotion.
"There's always room for improvement but I would rank the season as an eight
out of ten. We broke the away record for the club and put in some
magnificent performances. In general I thought it was a good season and the
task set for Big Sam and Macca was promotion and they did it."

Crucial to survival in the top league will be the continued form of last
season's key players. For Cottee, two of his fellow Academy graduate in
particular stood out.
"Mark Noble won the Hammer of the Year and has done really, really well. But
for me my Hammer of the Year was James Tomkins. I think it was very close
between them and I'm really pleased Mark won it but James was outstanding
last season. "Tonks was our Man of the Match at Wembley and should push on
next season into a top, top defender."

The 2011/12 season threw up plenty of dramatic moments, the most notable of
which was, of course, the last-gasp win against Blackpool in the Play-Off
final. But Cottee also has fond memories of another superb Ricardo Vaz
Te-inspired victory that will also live long in the memory of Hammers fans.
"Sitting in a bar in Dubai and watching the Hammers beat Brighton 6-0 was a
great highlight for me I must admit - I did enjoy that one! Some of the away
performances were great too as were the Play-Off semi-final games. The one
at home to Cardiff had such a fantastic atmosphere and the crowd were really
driving the boys on."

Cottee was able to take in the day of the final as a fan alongside his
children and like many other families, the day out in Wemlbey provided some
unforgettable memories for the Cottee clan. "It was fantastic; I had a
wonderful day and it has been a long time coming. I was at Wembley 31 years
ago when we played Liverpool and for Arsenal the year before in the FA Cup
final. "I couldn't sleep the whole week I was too excited; I've got twin
boys at 14 who I've brainwashed into being West Ham fans. From the moment we
got the train to Wembley and walked up Wembley Way it was a fantastic day
and to top it off we won the game. "It's a day I will long remember and even
if we don't play at Wembley again the boys have got those memories. "It was
great to see half of Wembley covered in claret and blue. We played in the
final and I always said it would be fantastic for the fans to have the day
out at Wembley and the fact that we won it made it a perfect day."

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That Was The Season That Was 2011/2012 - Part Three
KUMB,com
Filed: Thursday, 31st May 2012
By: Gordon Thrower

It's been dry warm & sunny over the last few days so, quite naturally,
Gordon Thrower's thoughts have been on Christmas and New Year as he wades
through the latest part of his look back at the season just ended. At this
rate he'll be lucky to finish by the time the next one starts!....

December

The month starts with us falling back to earth with a bump on the Saturday
as a team that looks as if it's played three games in five days somehow
contrives to lose 2-1 at home to Burnley, despite hitting the woodwork more
times than one would have thought possible. Southampton also manage to lose
at Doncaster so no harm done.

There's a welcome sight as Henri Lansbury and, more heart-warmingly Gary
O'Neil both get runouts in the Development squad's 3-0 win over Brentford.
Two goals come from a mystery trialist with the improbable name of Habib
Habibou, who, along with Papa Bouba Diop would add to the list of Cleo Laine
songs to be sung in E13.

One player definitely on his way in is 17 year-old Borehamwood midfielder
and oxymoron Pelly Ruddock. He is so highly rated that he bypasses the youth
team and goes straight into the Development Squad set up. Meanwhile we all
start looking for players with similar names – with Cruyff Quinn,
Beckenbauer Radford and Frank Lampard all looming on the horizon.

Disaster strikes as we travel to Reading. Guy Demel pulls up lame with what
looks like a torn thigh muscle after less than 90 seconds. His replacement
Joey O'Brien somehow contrives to pick up two yellow cards whilst Jack
Collison picks up a straight red for a girly push on Kebe following a rather
childish bit of mickey taking in which the Reading winger mimes pulling his
socks up. We lose 3-0 as Southampton scramble an unconvincing point in the
93rd minute of their match, drawing 2-2 at home against Blackpool.

Spurs fans cement their reputation as the Premiership's thickest by
bombarding cycling legend Sir Chris Hoy with abusive tweets (as I believe
they are called) over his refereeing performance in their 2-1 defeat at
Stoke. When the multi-medal winning Olympian helpfully points out that it
might be (admittedly poor) Premiership ref Chris FOY they are after, the
special needs ones remain defiant: "@chrishoy now denying that he's even a
ref. What kind of mugs does he take us for?" tweets one particularly
intelligent specimen. Presumably, Mr Don Logan (for it was he), he takes you
for the sort of thick mug who can't tell the difference between a cyclist
and a referee. Meanwhile, the lovely actress Diane Keen switches off her
twitter account when she hears that Mike Dean is in charge of the window
lickers' next match and local branches of Halfords are put on red alert in
case the riots start up again.

Reading boss Brian McDermott defends his idiot winger Kebe against charges
of bad sportsmanship claiming that Collison could have ended his player's
career. Only if he had plans to appear at the National Theatre, Brian.
McDermott applauds Allardyce for not defending Collison. Shame he couldn't
display the same sort of honesty himself really. There again when you have
Madejski as chairman I expect being economical with the truth is pretty much
par for the course.

Despite scoring twice in his trial match Habib Habibou-be-do-be-doo fails to
impress the management sufficiently for a deal to be offered and he returns
to Belgium. His place is taken in the "Player to be signed by the Hammers?"
section of the papers by Ryoichi Maeda who, according to his agent, is the
hottest thing to come out of Japan since that green radioactive horseradish
stuff that stings your nose when you eat it.

The injury list gets worse as we entertain Barnsley at home. Abdoullaye Faye
pulls up lame during the pre-match warm up, prompting a debut for Daniel
Potts who, as son of kids' coach and goalscoring legend Steve, makes us all
feel simultaneously proud and bloody old at the same time. As it happens the
youngster has a fine debut at left back as Papa Bouba Diop's first goal for
the Irons gives us a 1-0 win. The manager's programme notes bemoan the lack
of discipline shown in the Reading match. We can therefore only presume that
Mr Allardyce had a strong word with himself after being banished to the
stands after complaining about a number of poor refereeing decisions. The
win, coupled with Southampton only drawing 1-1 at Pompey leaves us one point
off the top.


The club announce that, following a successful loan spell at Oxford United,
Robert Hall is to have a further month at the Kassam Stadium. 24 hours
later, the club announce that, following a successful spell at Oxford United
Robert Hall is not to have a further month at the Kassam Stadium after all.
Presumably the club's injury crisis deepened in that 24 hour period.

Birmingham City are our next opponents. A decent individual goal from Cole
following a defensive slip sees us take the lead early on. David Murphy's
handball of a goalbound Faubert header is missed by the ref, a mistake made
even more costly by the fact that the offender remains on the pitch to head
a late equaliser. The ref did spot infringements by Faubert, Nolan and
McCartney, issuing yellow cards leading to suspensions for all three in the
upcoming match at Derby.

The FA conclude their long close look at the Suarez affair and decide that
the player is guilty of using racially offensive language and give him an 8
match ban. Even by the disgracefully low standards of Liverpool FC (which
seem to match those of the city's inhabitants) the club's reaction is
breathtakingly arrogant. "How dare the FA charge anyone to do with Liverpool
with anything" is the general tone of the statement, a press release which
is almost as offensive as anything Suarez has done. After years of having
the BBC being in love with everything connected with the red half of that
city, suddenly nobody is turning a blind eye to the goings on Anfield, a
smell that gets worse as players warm up in T-shirts bearing Suarez's image
in support of the "Uruguay One".

Back in the fresh air, the calendar year (and a rotten one it was too) ends
up with another defeat as a nightmare start at Pride Park on New Year's Eve
sees us go 2-0 down within ten minutes. Frank Nouble pulls one back before
the interval but the injuries and suspensions take their toll as a third
string XI finally go down 2-1. Annoyingly, we'd have gone top with a win as
Bristol City complete their double over Southampton.

And the Jools Holland programme was crap this year too.

January

Happy New Year! The Derby defeat having temporarily evicted us from the
automatic promotion places, a win against Coventry is a must. And we get it
as all those suspended return. A cricket score is avoided as Sky Blues
'keeper Murphy saves everything bar a Kevin Nolan effort on 66 minutes. Both
Southampton (at Brighton) and Boro' (at Blackpool) go down 3-0, a series of
results that see us join Southampton on points at the top.

Of course a new year means new window and we miss out on Spurs kid Andros
Townsend who ends up at Leeds on loan. Silly bids start to come in for the
likes of James Tomkins, for whom Newcastle have stuck in a derisory offer.
Worryingly it appears that Tomkins has a new agent, often the precursor to a
move.

Jordan Rhodes at Huddersfield Town is one player we are continually linked
with, with offers of varying sizes said to be on the table from us.
Unfortunately his five goal haul in the Terriers' 6-0 demolition of Wycombe
only sees the price go up again.

Should Rhodes arrive at the Boleyn, being cup-tied will not be an issue as
we contrive to lose 1-0 at Sheffield Wednesday. A largely inexperienced XI
still miss a shedload of chances – including a penalty from Sam Baldock –
before going out to an 88th minute winner from O'Grady. Another late one
then.

The central defensive area receives a boost in personnel as our first
signing of the window is announced. George John comes in from FC Dallas
after we see off a late bid from Athletico Knots Landing. John arrives on a
loan with an option deal.

Espionage news and police arrest a third person in what nobody is referring
to "Olympicgate". Spurs continue to deny any involvement. A Spurs spokesman
says: "As we have said before when we hired people to spy on those involved
in the Olympic Stadium process we had absolutely no idea that they would spy
on those involved in the Olympic Stadium process. When we were given the
invoice for the Aston Martin DB5 with ejector seat we were assured that this
was standard equipment for those involved in spying on those involved in the
Olympic Stadium process. The fact that some of the interchangeable licence
plates turned out to be false is therefore nothing to do with us".

Freddie Piquionne is linked with a departure from the club as efforts to
secure another striker are stepped up. The Daily Mail informs the world that
the player has signed for Wolves, either for free or for a "cut-price fee"
depending on whether you believe the start or the end of the article.
Unusually for the Mail, no comment is made on the effect that the deal will
have on house prices. Unsurprisingly, the article turns out to be complete
twaddle with the player still on the books at the Boleyn.

We return to league action with an unspectacular but solid win down at
ten-man Pompey, Mark Noble netting from the spot to give us all three
points. This leaves us still level with Southampton on points at the top,
though Boro's defeat at home to Burnley gives us a slightly more important
four point cushion from third place.

Another signing arrives, though this is firmly in the "one for the future"
box. Joe Dixon comes in as a free agent having last turned out for Grays
Athletic. The former Moan Utd trainee is given a two month contract to see
if he's up to it.

Police arrest yet another man in what I will get people to call
"Olympicgate" if it kills me. Tottenham deny involvement yet again: "We
asked Dame Judi Dench for her best man. With some gadgets. That's all."

Croatian Nikica Jelevic is the next striker to appear on the transfer radar.
Although much liked at Rangers, the Scottish club's run-in with the taxman
has potentially left the Ibrox mob in financial trouble, leaving them
vulnerable to bids for their better players.

There's a spot of welcome news as James Tomkins, despite or because of (you
pays yer money...) the attentions of a new agent, signs a new contract. The
announcement is made prior to kick off in the home match against Forest. We
win 2-1 with two penalties from Mark Noble, one dodgy, one not. Forest's
goal is too late to be anything other than a consolation. The manner of the
home team's performance causes some disquiet despite the fact that the
victory sees us go clear at the top with Southampton not playing until the
following Monday.

The Forest match marks the final match in charge of media things at the club
for Greg Demetriou, who is moving on for a quieter life in a similar role at
the FA. The players mark Greg's departure by throwing him fully clothed into
an ice bath. Family commitments preclude my attendance at the post match
leaving do which, I am reliably informed, got "a bit messy". Best of luck
sir!

The weekend sees some sad news as the death of former 'keeper Ernie Gregory
is announced. Gregory, who was in his 90's, spent over 50 years at the club
as player and coach and was rated by my Dad as one of the best 'keepers he'd
ever seen at the Boleyn. And trust me my Dad knows his stuff.

Someone with whom Gregory would have been all too familiar is Harry Redknapp
whose long-awaited appearance in court on tax charges finally commences. As
expected the "Father Ted" defence ("that money was just resting in my
account")is much in evidence, though legal and tax experts are also
impressed by the use of the "Father Dougal" variation ("what's going on?
Where am I?") of that defence.

Herita Ilunga departs. Having spent most of the season so far at Doncaster
on loan, the player returns to find he is still surplus to requirements. One
of those "by mutual consent" announcements is cobbled together and his
contract, that has another 18 months or so to run, is torn up.

We get involved in talks to sign Portuguese striker Eder from Academia de
Coimbra. At least we do until he disappears. Seemingly unaware of the
tradition that you have to sign for the Irons before going missing (Boogers,
Savio etc), the player elects to go walkabout while talks are going on.
"Something didn't feel right" claimed the player. You're not kidding mate.

Next on the list seems to be Brazilian striker Ze Eduardo who is set to come
in for a medical at The Shaun Wright-Phillips Memorial Medical Centre. We
are set to become the player's sixteenth club in seven years (how is that
even possible?) until things get put on hold as talks are opened with
Bristol City's Nicky Maynard. We also stick in a bid for former Allardyce
protégé (Bolton again) Ricardo Vaz Te, which Barnsley reject as "derisory"
despite the fact that the player will be available on a free at the end of
the season.

The Jelevic deal finally dies on its feet allowing Everton to come in and
sign the player as we are linked with Moan Utd bad boy Ravel Morrison, who
is apparently both talented and wayward in equal measures.

Rather inconveniently, deadline day coincides with a visit to Portman Road.
Rather inconveniently the team choose to have their worst performance of the
season going down 5-1 with barely a whimper, never mind a fight. Collison
heads the goal that temporarily pulls us back into the game at 2-1.

The transfer window closes with three more signings completed as Maynard,
Vaz Te and Morrison are all added to the squad. Vaz Te's arrival puts a
temporary halt to Ze Eduardo' s attempt to break the record for the most
clubs played for as we withdraw our interest. Morrison immediately reminds
us of his problems by getting into a verbal spat with some idiot on twitter,
the FA asking for Morrison's comments over his use of the word "faggot" as
an insult, eventually slapping a misconduct charge on the player.


The closing of the window is a historic day for West Ham United FC as
thousands of fans gather round outside the Boleyn Ground to celebrate the
fact that, for the first time since 1895 we have gone through an entire
transfer window without once being linked with Eidur Gudjohnsen. Grown men
cry at the passing of an old established tradition, which the club shop
marks by dishing out commemorative t-shirts and mugs.

February
You will recall (if you're reading this in the correct order and don't have
some sort of memory loss problem) that back in January former Hammer's media
boss Greg Demetriou left the club to take on a similar role at the FA. If
you don't recall then you know now. Any plans that Greg may have had for a
quieter life are immediately thrown into some disarray by the English legal
system. John Terry pleads not guilty to charges over his alleged racial
abuse of Anton Ferdinand. All hopes that the issue will be dealt with
quickly are dashed, with the full hearing into the matter slated for a date
after Euro 2012. The FA elect to strip Terry of the captaincy, it not having
occurred to them previously that the loathsome excuse for a human being
ought never have been within a million miles of the job in the first place.
We're just surprised that M Lipton esq hasn't started a campaign to have a
statue erected in honour of Terry at Wembley, "like the Bobby Moore one only
bigger because Terry's England's Greatest Ever Captain". They'd save money
on the plaque of course. Whereas Bobby's statue bears a 42 word inscription,
Terry's could make do with just the word "twat".

Back on the domestic front a major police operation takes place as we face
Millwall in a lunchtime kick off. Team selection is interesting after the
Ipswich debacle, with Tomkins selected to play in a role just in front of
the back four. The idiot contingent amongst the visiting support make great
claims about walking around Plaistow unopposed, strangely forgetting to
mention that anyone who might have been interested in debating the point
with them was happily tucked up in the ground, what with the match having
kicked off fifteen minutes earlier and all.

By that time we had been reduced to ten men with following a two-footed
Nolan tackle that had the merit of going for the ball but little else going
for it. Other bad challenges – including a slow-mo thigh high kung-fu
assault on Matt Taylor bizarrely escape sanction from ref Mike Jones for
whom competence still seems to be a major problem (see Stoke last season).

Thankfully Millwall the team is every bit as useless as its support and,
with Tomkins pressed into a more formal midfield role after Nolan's
dismissal, we dominate the match taking a lead through Carlton Cole just
before the interval. Millwall somehow pull back an equaliser but we
controversially regain the lead shortly after as 'keeper Forde elects to
punch a catchable one before being clattered by Faubert, Reid volleying the
ball straight back in to the unguarded net. It's as if ref Jones had
remembered his disgraceful performance at the Britannia last season and
figured he owed us one. 2-1 to the cockney boys. I personally take all of
South East London on my own by singing "Bubbles" loudly on their manor. Ok
it was 2.30am (my journey home having been delayed by a concert and a lot of
inclement weather) and there was consequently nobody about but apparently
that counts.

Next we go back to Southwark Crown Court where, despite admitting to have
opened an offshore bank account in the name of his dog, and, somehow, having
forgotten to inform his accountant of said account, Henry Redknapp is
acquitted of both charges facing him. As a qualified tax specialist,
professional ethics prevent me from commenting further but let's just say
that perhaps the prosecution didn't make the best of what they had.

Meanwhile our old mate Greg Demetriou has barely had time to find out where
the digestives are kept at Wembley before there is more fallout from the
ditching of Terry as skipper. Manager Capello is quoted in interviews with
the Italian media as being unhappy that the FA have gone over his head. A
meeting to discuss the matter at Wembley ends up with the Italian resigning.
Absolutely nobody is upset. Unsurprisingly, Redknapp's media pals install
him as England manager elect, conveniently ignoring the fact that his record
over the years isn't that impressive. Still he's English and that's all that
seems to matter apparently.

Our next match at Peterborough falls foul to the weather with temperatures
hitting -15 overnight at London Road, an old fashioned ground without
undersoil heating. Southampton take advantage of our inactivity to reduce
the deficit at the top to one point.

Elsewhere and just when you think Liverpool couldn't act more disgracefully,
they do. Suarez, in his second match back from his 8 match ban for doing
nothing (according to his employers) or racially abusing Evra (according to
everyone else), stokes up ill-feeling by refusing to shake Evra's hand in
the (admittedly ludicrous) pre-match handshake thing. There are scuffles in
the tunnel at half time and full time as the whining Mancs beat the
self-pitying Scousers 2-1. Dalglish is predictably disgraceful in his post
match comments: "you are bang out of order to blame Suarez for anything that
happened today" the moaning Scot claims as he metamorphoses into a sort of
Caledonian Neil Warnock. As usual Scouse supporters go into truth denial
overdrive claiming that it was Evra who had refused the handshake despite
the fact that it so very obviously wasn't. This line of argument is quietly
dropped as Suarez admits that he's in the wrong and apologises for his
actions, though the sincerity of both his and Dalglish's apologies is highly
questionable, coming as they do after instructions from the club's American
holding company who know a good PR disaster when they see one.

Back in the fresh air again we take on Southampton at the Boleyn in a top of
the table clash. Unfortunately Southampton can count on a fully fit and
incompetent Lee Probert who has a disgraceful 90 minutes. Probert
inexplicably ignores two blatant handballs before finally awarding a penalty
for a trip on Noble. Billy Sharp loses all goodwill by clutching his face as
Taylor shoves him in the chest to give the midfielder a red card Sharp's
similar push on Noble goes unpunished as Probert goes into a one man attempt
to rewrite the record books for most inept refereeing performance. Noble
finally puts the penalty away to give us the lead. Southampton 'keeper
Davies then handles outside the box flattening Cole in a "Shumacher on
Battiston" style challenge that Probert decides is perfectly legal.
Southampton finally equalise from Hooiveld with fifteen minutes left despite
an obvious foul in the build up. All in all a good point to get given the
disgraceful refereeing involved – which, I am duty bound to remind you, we
must respect.

In a quiet few days for the Hammers, Carlos Tevez returns to the Man City
training camp to find everyone else has the day off. "Mancini treated me
like a dog" claims Tevez. Mancini denies that was the case saying "we get
the club doctor to do that operation on all our players".

The London Borough of Harringay and the Greater London Authority announce a
package worth £27m to spruce up riot-torn Tottenham. The package includes a
whole raft of infrastructrure improvements linked to the Tottenham stadium
redevelopment project. Meanwhile, in a totally unconnected announcement it
is quietly announced that Tottenham's legal obligation to cough up something
like £16m towards a whole raft of infrastructure projects linked to the
Tottenham stadium redevelopment project has been removed. In effect at least
£16m of taxpayers' money has been handed to Spurs. Suddenly the European
Commission finds itself having to deal with dozens of complaints regarding
illegal state aid, most of which seem entirely more justified than the
anonymous one posted by someone called Steve Lawrence at the time of the
original Olympic deal.

North of the border, Rangers take over from Hearts as the nation's basket
case. With a possible £75m owing to the taxman, the club enters
administration. It is a measure of the paucity of competition up north that,
despite the ten point deduction that comes with such financial shenanigans,
they are still streets clear of the third-placed club.

Also in financial bother, again, are Pompey, whose owners had gone into
administration a few months previously. Vladimir Antonov, the club's
ultimate owner appears in court on a European arrest warrant as the
Lithuanian authorities indicate that they'd like a quiet word about the
millions missing from one or two of their banks. Fans ask the Football
League how on earth Antonov had passed their "fit & proper" test. "He lied"
comes the answer. "He told us he was rich and it turned out that he was just
a great big fibber". Some good comes out of the whole affair though. The
Football League announce changes to their "fit & proper" test. "In future
we'll check their hands so that when they tell us they are rich they won't
be able to cross their fingers".

Portsmouth eventually enter administration themselves prompting a ten point
penalty and worries over their ability to complete their fixtures, something
that could end up costing us six points.

Following the opening fixture of the season when Cardiff supporters were
asked to pick up their tickets at an M25 service area, ticket details for
the return fixture are announced. A series of clues are to be left at
strategic points on the route between London and Wales, each clue being
written by the person responsible for the clues on 1980's gameshow "3-2-1".
Those that successfully complete the challenge will be given tickets. Those
that don't will be getting a radio controlled dustbin with a stupid grin
painted on its face. "We tried this successfully earlier with Millwall
(pronounced Michwach)" a South Wales Police spokesman told us. "No
supporters got to the ground – they found the "if tickets ye seek, to
Cardiff West Services ye should wend" clue a bit too challenging, though the
dustbins are now on three-year contracts at the Den. We'll have to make the
clues a bit harder than that for West Ham supporters though or you'll go
straight there. Er, I probably shouldn't have told you that" he helpfully
adds.

Boxing news, and there is uproar in Germany at a press conference when Derek
Chisora, fresh from becoming the latest bit of cannon fodder for one of
those Ukranian brothers whose names I can't be bothered to check the
spelling of, gets into a bit of a ruccus with Millwall-supporter David Haye.
The spat starts of in verbal form but spills over into actual violence as
Chisora climbs down from the platform to continue the debate. Chisora is
later arrested by the Deutscher Bundesplod at the airport but is later
released without charge. Haye sneaks out of the country before Das Alter
Wilhelm (as I expect the locals call their constabulary) can catch up with
him. Meanwhile boxing fans are left scratching their collective heads
wondering why neither Chisora nor Hay could be bothered to show that much
fight in their respective fights with those Ukranian brothers whose names I
can't be bothered to check the spelling of.

The weekend sees us clicking our heels as Southampton go top beating Derby
4-0 at home. Blackpool, who should have been our own opponents for the day,
are otherwise occupied with being knocked out of the cup by Everton. The
rearranged match takes place on the Tuesday with a win needed to return to
top slot. Even by West Ham standards the match is a bit bonkers in the nut.
We race into a deserved 2-0 lead through midfield maestro Tomkins and
Maynard who scores on his first start. Holloway rearranges things after half
an hour and sub Kevin Phillips pulls one back on the stroke of half time. In
the second half Rob Green becomes the third Hammer in as many matches to see
a red card, after upending Bednar outside the box. With no sub 'keeper on
the truncated bench, Lansbury becomes the second loan signing from Arsenal
of the season to take his place in goal, his previous goalkeeping experience
having come in England U21 colours under similar circumstances. Lansbury is
barely bothered and keeps a clean sheet as we score another two through
O'Neil and Vaz Te to take the match 4-1, a result that takes us back to the
top by a point with a game in hand over Southampton.

On the international front John Terry announces that he'll be out for six
weeks with a knee injury thus saving England caretaker boss Stuart Pearce
the cost of a "you're dropped" text massage and also sparing the rest of the
squad the embarrassment of having to be in the same room as such low life.

We return to action against Crystal Palace with a team unchanged from that
which won at Blackpool. The exertions of playing three in a row with ten men
are all too obvious in the first half. A few changes in the second half sees
things improve but although we seem the more likely to score in the second
period the match finishes goalless. According to the Sun newspaper the
players leave to a "deafening chorus of boos". This, not to put too fine a
point on it, is a lie. Southampton's 3-0 win at Watford, which features yet
another dive to win a penalty, takes them back to the top by one point,
though we still have a game in hand.

England – who feature Rob Green safely on the bench -lose the first match of
the post-Capello era 3-2 to the Netherlands, despite clawing back a 2-0
deficit with moments to spare. Caretaker manager Stuart Pearce rules himself
out of contention for the role on a full time basis amidst rumours that the
not-so-cordial history between Sir Trevor Brooking and Henry Redknapp might
count against the latter in the race to get the full-time job. That and the
fact that Redknapp isn't much of a coach presumably.

So there you go. Second in the league with two months of the season left. A
few wins in March and we could be up by the end of the month. No
worries.....

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Jussi Jaaskelainen set to leave Bolton Wanderers
BBC.co.uk

Jussi Jaaskelainen is set to end his 15-year stay at Bolton Wanderers. BBC
Radio Manchester has learned the veteran goalkeeper is set to reject an
offer to remain with the Trotters, for whom he has played 529 games. Adam
Bogdan was preferred to Jaaskelainen for the second half of last season, the
Finn's last appearance coming against Wolves on 31 December. West Ham,
managed by former Bolton boss Sam Allardyce, have been strongly linked with
a move for the 37-year-old.
Finland international Jaaskelainen moved to England from VPS Vaasa in 1997
and, following Bolton's promotion to the top flight in 2001, became one of
the most highly-rated goalkeepers in the Premier League. Bolton allowed 15
players to leave following their relegation from the Premier League earlier
this month.

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Are the Hammers Weighing Up a Bid for Ba?
West Ham Till I Die
By S J Chandos About 8 hours ago

West Ham are allegedly weighing up a bid for Senegal International Ba.
That's centre-back Abdoulaye Ba, not a certain Newcastle Utd striker of the
same surname and nationality!

Abdoulaye Ba is a 21 year old international defender, who is contracted to
Porto, but has earnt extremely good reviews for his performances, last
season, while on loan to Academica. A deal is possible with Porto, but the
big 'fly in the ointment' is a question mark over whether he can secure a UK
work permit. We will have to see whether the club can circumvent that
particular obstacle, because by all accounts he looks to be is a very
promising player.

Talking of promising players, West Ham have also been linked with a £5m move
for Fulham goal keeper, David Stockdale. Obviously, Rob Green has yet to
make a final decision on the new contract currently on the table. But
reports suggest that QPR are ready to give Green a 3 year contract, worth
£50,000 a week. If so, then it is not likely that West Ham will match those
terms. That means securing a new keeper sudden becomes a higher priority. We
already have Henderson of course, who is a very good prospect and could very
well take his first team chance next season. There is a strong possibility
that a certain Finnish veteran international keeper, who has just rejected a
new contract at Bolton, could soon arrive at Upton Park on a free transfer.
If that is the case then would the club commit £5m of the transfer kitty on
acquiring Stockdale?

I have no objections, in principle, to securing David Stockdale's services,
but I think I would prefer to keep Green (if at all possible), bring in
Jussi Jaaskelainen and get them to fight it out with Henderson for the goal
keeper's jersey. That combination would give us the strongest stable of
keepers that we have had for many a year and keep all three on their toes,
performance wise. Whether it happens is another matter? I am certainly
looking forward to seeing Henderson in action, as he has a reputation as a
outstanding young keeper. Is he ready for next season? He probably needs to
start as No.2 and get the opportunity to ease himself in to PL football
during the course of the season.

A brace of players that I would like to acquire are Nathan Clyne and Wilfred
Zaha from Crystal Palace. There is a rumour that a West Ham bid for Zaha has
been submitted and is awaiting a decision by Palace. While Clyne is at the
end of his contract and is able to move in the summer on a Bosman. Man Utd
are reported to be in poll position position to snap him up and that is the
move that the player allegedly wants. However, if he were available, and we
cold entice him to Upton Park, then the Clyne-Zaha combination would
significantly augment the options on our right flank. On the left, I would
be minded to go with McCartney and Potts at left-back, but if a
reinforcement is required the outstanding candidate is probably Olsson at
Blackburn Rovers. Olsson is a very good left-back, with pace and the ability
to get up and down the flanks. Unfortunately, Chelski are also reported to
be running the rule over him. We are supposedly considing a move for
left-back come left-winger, Kieran Richardson at Sunderland. He is not a
player that I particularly fancy bringing to the club, Although I recognise
that Richardson does have a certain utility value, being able to play right
along the left flank. For me, the outstandng young left-winger up for grabs
is Matt Jarvis at Wolves. Wolves apparently want £8m for his signature, but
£5-6m should be enough to clinch a deal.

Another player reportedly available this summer is another Olsson, this time
Jonas at WBA. Jonas Olsson is a strong centre-back, who can also play at
left-back. He would provide good competition for Tomkins and Reid and also
cover at left full-back. However, for me, the 'stand out' centre-half
currently up for grabs is Roger Johnson at Wolves. It has been suggested in
some quarters that West Ham might move for Scott Dann at Blackburn Rovers,
but personally out of the two I would prefer to sign Johnson.

Elsewhere, it is still unclear where Junior Hollett is headed? Rumour has it
that either Arsenal or Spurs are favourites to secure his signature, but if
Sam Allardyce could pull off a deal for his former young charge at
Blackburn, then it would be a real coup. In midfield, I have not given up on
securing Henri Lansbury for next season, either via a permanent transfer or
a further season long loan. Overall, Lansbury did a good job for us in the
last campaign, but injury disrupted his progress, and I think that he would
have a major role to play in our forthcoming PL campaign. An alternative
option could be signing Andy King at Leicester City, who is more than
capable of stepping up to the PL. However, the midfield position that does
concern me is the lack of a good, experienced defensive anchor man. Whilst
O'Brien, O'Neill or Noble could do a good job there, I would still like to
see us bring in a dominating, defensve midfielder, in the mould of the
recently released Diop.

It looks very much as if we have missed the boat with Jay Rodriguez, which
is something that we may come to regret. Southampton are reported to have
had a c.£7m bid accepted and a deal is imminent, subject to the player
agreeing personal terms with the Saints. So, we must look elsewhere to
bolster our strikeforce. In Cole-Vaz Te-Maynard we have reasonable quality
up front. In addtion, we also have Hall and Baldock, who look likely to
start the season out on loan. Certainly, Robert Hall needs to spend the
period up to Christmas on loan at a decent Championship club. This would
facilitate sharpening up his finishing in preparation for more anticipated
first team game team..The speculation is that Baldock is due to go out on
loan to Ipswich Town, although it is also possible that West Ham might cash
in on him if the money on offer is sufficient.

The move for Yakubu could be a good one if the player continues in the same
vein as last season. He resolved his outstanding fitness issues and
rediscovered his goal scoring form. Yakubu would provide good competition
for Cole and potentially combine well with either Vaz Te or Maynard. Of
course, one hopes that our bid for Bas Dost is successful, but if not Yakubu
could do a job. Another striker up for grabs this summer is Berbatov, who is
due to exit Manchester Utd. The Bulgarian International is a player I would
love to see at Upton Park, he is just the type of striker that would inject
that crucial bit of extra class in to our forward line. Whether we could
secure his services is another matter. It would certainly be a statement of
the club's ambition if we could land a striker of his status and ability.
But as always, the bottom line is the transfer and wage budgets available,
that inevitably must limit our ambition in acquiring players!

Finally, where is Sam Allardyce's 'wild card' acquisition likely to come
from? Allardyce has a reputation for attracting good quality foreign
players, some of them top players entering the veteran stage of their
careers. Is it beyond the bounds of possibility that there might be one or
two of those type of deals in the pipeline? There could well be!

SJ. Chandos.

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West Ham eye move for centre back Ba but hold worries over work permit
By SPORTSMAIL REPORTER
PUBLISHED: 21:33 GMT, 31 May 2012 | UPDATED: 21:33 GMT, 31 May 2012
Daily Mail

West Ham are keen on Senegal defender Abdoulaye Ba. The centre back, 21, is
on loan from Porto at Portuguese side Academica and is earning rave reviews.

West Ham scouts watched him but worry he may not qualify for a work permit.

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Hearn: Ground-share with West Ham would mean sale of Brisbane Road could be
invested in the club
London 24
Tom Moore
Thursday, May 31, 2012
5:11 PM

Leyton Orient chairman Barry Hearn has revealed that the assets of selling
their ground would go into the team if they were to ground-share the Olympic
Stadium with rivals West Ham. The club are looking into the move after it
was revealed that seating could be used to cover the athletics track. "As
far as I see it, Leyton Orient have three options," Hearn said. "We have
some considerable assets at Brisbane Road, so if we were to move into the
Olympic Stadium then the money raised from Brisbane Road will be invested
into the team and hopefully help the club rise through the leagues. "I am of
the belief that if West Ham move in then in the medium term we will go out
of business or drop down the divisions – neither of which I want to see
happen. "Another alternative is we look at a site outside Leyton but with
the economy as it is that may not be viable. "We have time to agree
whichever one of those three options."

Hearn had been strongly opposed to the Hammers occupying the Olympic Stadium
outright and insisted that a move to within walking distance of Orient's
Brisbane Road ground would kill his club. The chairman had also claimed that
the stadium was "not fit for football" but has explained why he has had a
change of heart. "We've come to the understanding that West Ham are
insisting that the stadium has seats fitted over the athletics track," Hearn
added. "When London was named as the Olympic venue in 2005 we were the
preferred tenant after the games for a 25,000 seater stadium and we would
not open the top tiers but then the design revealed that the athletics track
would make it unfit for football. "We will never ever play in a ground with
an athletics track in front of the supporters. "We are hearing that West Ham
agree that the track needs to be removed, which is why we are interested in
the proposal. "The two clubs play their home games on alternate weekends
meaning it will have constant use."

West Ham have not yet been awarded the Olympic Stadium, although they are
the favourites to take over the Stratford site and Hearn explained how the
ground-share would work. "It would not be a relationship between Leyton
Orient and West Ham," Hearn added. "We would be tenants in our own right but
we will share the ground. "We would not pay to make the ground fit for
football. "The stadium cost around £600 million to build in the first place.
"We are in phase three of the bidding process and this is the legacy
company's problem."

The move however could be scuppered and sources at West Ham have suggested
that a ground-share would not be welcomed by the Hammers. The Leyton Orient
Fans Trust also want to ascertain what the club's plans are for the stadium
and remain adamant that the site is not fit for football use. Hearn has
moved to ease the concerns of supporters who are unhappy at a proposed move.
"We will certainly consult our supporters," the chairman insisted. "We would
never move without consulting them. "There is no point in going into
consultations at this stage in the process as the full facts are not
revealed yet and we do not know if the stadium will be fit for football. "We
will take time to agree on what's best for the club."

A final decision on who takes hold of the Olympic Stadium is expected in
October, after the 30th Olympiad. Other bidders include Essex County Cricket
Club in a joint venture with the University of East London. West Ham were
initially awarded the venue last year but the deal fell through following an
anonymous complaint to the European Union. Spurs and Orient, who were
challenging the decision, deny they made the complaint.

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Bolton keeper in line to replace West Ham United and England player
Guardian Series
12:21pm Thursday 31st May 2012 in News

Jussi Jaaskelainen is thought to be heading for West Ham United: Action
Images Bolton goalkeeper Jussi Jaaskelainen has been linked with a move to
West Ham United after turning down a new deal. Hammers keeper Robert Green
is out of contract this summer and is expected to leave with Malaga thought
to be favourites to sign him. West Ham boss Sam Allardyce will need to bring
in a replacement, should Green depart, and Jaaskelainen is thought to be in
pole position to move to Upton Park.

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