Saturday, August 28

Daily WHUFC News - 28th August 2010

Manchester United match preview
WHUFC.com
All the team news and background information ahead of Saturday's trip to Old
Trafford
26.08.2010

Manchester United v West Ham United
Barclays Premier League
Saturday 28 August
Kick-off: 5.30pm
Referee: Mark Clattenburg


Introduction

• West Ham United head for Manchester United seeking their first Barclays
Premier League point of the season, having fallen to defeat at Aston Villa
(3-0) and at home to Bolton Wanderers (3-1) in their opening two fixtures.
• The Hammers' confidence has been boosted by a midweek Carling Cup
second-round victory over Oxford United (1-0) at the Boleyn Ground. The draw
for the third round will be made on Saturday. The seven English clubs
involved in European competition will enter the tournament along with the 25
second-round winners. Third-round ties will be contested in the week
commencing Monday 20 September 2010.
• Manchester United have taken four points from their opening two Barclays
Premier League fixtures, beating Newcastle United (3-0) at Old Trafford
before drawing at Fulham (2-2) last Sunday. Prior to those wins, the Red
Devils also defeated Chelsea (3-1) at Wembley to win the FA Community
Shield. This weekend's match will mark United's first Saturday 3pm kick-off
of the 2010/11 season.
• West Ham will be seeking their first victory and first points at Old
Trafford since Carlos Tevez scored the winner in a 1-0 Hammers success on 13
May 2007. Since then, United have won all three meetings, scoring nine goals
and conceding just one - Dean Ashton's acrobatic volley in a 4-1 victory on
3 May 2008.
• West Ham's biggest-ever win at Manchester United came in Division One on
19 March 1927, when club-record goalscorer Vic Watson netted twice and
Joseph Johnson once in a 3-0 victory at Old Trafford in front of 20,000
spectators.
• Manchester United's biggest ever home win over the Hammers occurred in the
FA Cup fourth round on 26 January 2003. Ryan Giggs and Ruud van Nistelrooy
both scored twice, while Phil Neville and Ole Gunnar Solskjaer netted once
apiece in a 6-0 success.
Live broadcast
• The match is live on ESPN this Saturday from 4.45pm. You can catch the
Hammers again on ESPN when they travel to Anfield to face Liverpool for
another Saturday tea-time fixture on 20 November.

• ESPN have live matches each week from the Barclays Premier League, the FA
Cup, Clydesdale Bank Premier League, UEFA Europa League, Serie A,
Bundesliga, Dutch Eredivisie and UEFA EURO 2012 international qualifiers.
For more information on how you can get ESPN visit espn.co.uk/tv.
• ESPN is available on Sky, Virgin Media, BT Vision, Top Up TV, TalkTalk TV
and UPC (in Ireland) on the following channel numbers:
Sky: Channel 417 & 442 (HD). Virgin Media: Channel 529 & 530 (HD). BT
Vision: Channel 34. Top Up TV: Channel 34. TalkTalk TV: Channel 555. UPC (in
Ireland): Channel 407

Team news
West Ham United

• Matthew Upson may be fit to return following the facial injury he suffered
playing against Bolton Wanderers last Saturday. Upson was kicked in the face
by Kevin Davies and suffered a severe nose bleed, as well as damage to his
lip.
• Defender Winston Reid could also return to the matchday squad after being
rested for Tuesday's Carling Cup win over Oxford United, as were England
trio Robert Green, Kieron Dyer and Carlton Cole, a late substitute.
• Thomas Hitzlsperger remains on the sidelines after picking up a thigh
injury during Germany's international friendly draw in Denmark earlier this
month.
• Hungary Under-21 goalkeeper Peter Kurucz has joined Jack Collison and
Zavon Hines on the long-term injured list after rupturing his anterior
cruciate ligament while playing for the reserve team against Ipswich Town on
14 August.
• Tal Ben Haim and Manuel da Costa may also be in contention for Saturday's
game. Ben Haim made a successful debut in Tuesday's win over Oxford, while
Da Costa returned to the matchday squad for the same match following a short
spell on the sidelines.
• Benni McCarthy will also be hoping to play a part at Old Trafford, having
made a useful contribution off the substitutes bench against Oxford.

Manchester United
• England striker Wayne Rooney is expected to return to Manchester United's
starting XI after missing last Sunday's 2-2 Barclays Premier League draw at
Fulham with a virus.
• Long-term absentees Rio Ferdinand, Owen Hargreaves and Anderson will
definitely not be available for Saturday's fixture.
Previous meetings
• The most recent meeting between the two sides took place at Old Trafford
on 23 February 2010, with Manchester United running out 3-0 winners. Wayne
Rooney scored twice either side of half-time before Michael Owen added a
third ten minutes from time.

The lineups were:
Manchester United: Foster, Evra, Vidic, Neville, Brown, Valencia, Anderson
(Park 19), Gibson, Scholes, Rooney (Owen 78), Berbatov (Diouf 78)
Subs not used: Kuszczak, Jonny Evans, Rafael, Fletcher
West Ham United: Green, Upson, Spector, Tomkins, Kovac, Noble, Behrami
(Collison 63) , Faubert, Cole, Franco (Mido 45), Diamanti (Dyer 75)
Subs not used: Stech, Da Costa, Daprela, Ilan
• Saturday's fixture marks the 120th competitive fixture between West Ham
United and Manchester United. The Hammers have won 41, the Red Devils 54 and
there have been 24 draws.
Overall record
v Manchester United (all competitions) W 41 D 24 L 54

Last time out

• West Ham United needed a last-minute Scott Parker goal to defeat League
Two new boys Oxford United 1-0 in the Carling Cup second round on Tuesday
evening. Manager Avram Grant made six changes to the side that lost 3-1 to
Bolton Wanderers in the Barclays Premier League last Saturday, handing
debuts to Marek Stech and Tal Ben Haim and first starts of the season to
Jonathan Spector, Junior Stanislas and Freddie Sears.
24 August 2010
Carling Cup second round
West Ham United 1-0 Oxford United
West Ham: Stech, Ben Haim, Spector, Faubert, Tomkins, Parker, Noble,
Barrera, Stanislas (Cole 62), Piquionne, Sears (McCarthy 78)
Subs not used: Green, Ilunga, Da Costa, Kovac, Boa Morte
• Manchester United were denied a second-consecutive Barclays Premier League
victory to open the new season by Fulham defender Brede Hangeland's late
header at Craven Cottage last Sunday. Paul Scholes and a Hangeland own-goal
had twice given Sir Alex Ferguson's side the lead in west London, only for
the Norwegian to head past Edwin van der Sar with a minute remaining.
22 August 2010
Barclays Premier League
Fulham 2-2 Manchester United
Manchester United: Van der Sar, Evra, Vidic, O'Shea, Jonny Evans, Park (Nani
67) , Fletcher, Valencia (Owen 74), Scholes, Hernandez (Giggs 74), Berbatov
Subs not used: Kuszczak, Rafael, Smalling, Carrick

West Ham United

• West Ham United manager Avram Grant is seeking his first Barclays Premier
League win since taking charge at the Boleyn Ground in June. The Israeli
tasted competitive victory for the first time courtesy of Tuesday evening's
1-0 Carling Cup second-round success against Oxford United.
• Grant tasted victory over Manchester United during his single season as
manager of Chelsea in 2007/08. A Michael Ballack brace saw the Blues defeat
United 2-1 at Stamford Bridge in April 2008. However, the Red Devils gained
revenge the following month by defeating Grant's side on penalties in Moscow
to lift the UEFA Champions League trophy.
• The Hammers have so far brought in five new players this summer - Germany
midfielder Thomas Hitzlsperger, Mexico winger Pablo Barrera, France forward
Frederic Piquionne, New Zealand defender Winston Reid and Israel defender
Tal Ben Haim, who has arrived on loan from Grant's former club Portsmouth.
• Italian forward Alessandro Diamanti was allowed to leave the Boleyn Ground
in midweek, departing for Italian Serie A new boys Brescia Calcio following
a single season in east London.
• Second-year professional Matt Fry has joined League One promotion-chasers
Charlton Athletic on loan until January.
• West Ham possess the tenth best all-time record in Premier League history.
Since the Premier League was formed in 1992, the Hammers have contested 580
matches, winning 195, drawing 144 and losing 239. During that period, West
Ham have amassed 731 points.

Manchester United

• Sir Alex Ferguson has begun his 25th season as Manchester United manager
seeking a record-breaking 12th Premier League and 19th league title.
• To boost their chances, Ferguson has brought in Mexico FIFA World Cup
forward Javier 'Chicarito' Hernandez from CD Guadalajara, Fulham's England
Under-21 defender Chris Smalling and Portuguese winger Bebe from Vitoria de
Guimaraes, for whom he failed to make a single competitive appearance.
• United have allowed five youngsters to go out on loan - forwards Mame
Biram Diouf and Danny Welbeck have joined Blackburn Rovers and Sunderland
respectively, Joshua King and Matthew James have linked-up with Preston
North End, while Cameron Stewart has moved to Yeovil Town.
• Manchester United possess the best all-time record in Premier League
history. Since the Premier League was formed in 1992, United have contested
698 matches, winning 450, drawing 148 and losing 100. In that period, the
Red Devils have collected 1498 points - 183 more than nearest rivals
Arsenal.

Ten-year league records
West Ham United

2009/10 Premier League 17th (35 points)
2008/09 Premier League 9th (51 points)
2007/08 Premier League 10th (49 points)
2006/07 Premier League 15th (41 points)
2005/06 Premier League 9th (55 points)
2004/05 Championship 6th (73 points - promoted via play-offs)
2003/04 Championship 4th (74 points)
2002/03 Premier League 18th (42 points - relegated to Championship)
2001/02 Premier League 7th (53 points)
2000/01 Premier League 15th (42 points)

Manchester United
2009/10 Premier League 2nd (85 points)
2008/09 Premier League 1st (90 points)
2007/08 Premier League 1st (87 points)
2006/07 Premier League 1st (89 points)
2005/06 Premier League 2nd (83 points)
2004/05 Premier League 3rd (77 points)
2003/04 Premier League 3rd (75 points)
2002/03 Premier League 1st (83 points)
2001/02 Premier League 3rd (77 points)
2000/01 Premier League 1st (80 points)

Old boys
• West Ham United defender Jonathan Spector joined Manchester United as a
17-year-old in 2003. The United States international, who has a German
passport, spent two seasons at Old Trafford - making eight appearances for
the first team - before moving to Charlton Athletic on a season-long loan in
the summer of 2005. Spector left Manchester United for West Ham in June 2006
for an initial fee of £500,000.
• Manchester United have two former West Ham United players in their squad.
England defender Rio Ferdinand made 158 appearances for the club between May
1996 and November 2000, scoring two goals. Midfielder Michael Carrick scored
six goals in 159 appearances between July 1999 and May 2004.
• Among the other players who have represented both clubs are Roy Carroll,
Noel Cantwell, Luke Chadwick, Billy Grassam, Paul Ince, Ralph Milne,
Frederick Milnes, Frank O'Farrell, Stuart Pearson, Dave Sexton, Teddy
Sheringham and Raimond van der Gouw.

Officials
Referee - Mark Clattenburg
Assistant referees - Adam Watts and Martin Yerby
Fourth official - Mike Jones

• County Durham-born Mark Clattenburg will be Saturday's referee. It will be
the first time Clattenburg has taken charge of a West Ham United fixture
since the 4-1 Premier League defeat at Chelsea on 13 March 2010.
• After taking up refereeing as part of his Duke of Edinburgh Award scheme,
Clattenburg worked his way up through the Northern League and Conference
League before being named to the Football League Assistant Referees List in
1999.
• Clattenburg was promoted to the National List of Football League referees
in 2000.
• The 35-year-old was the man in the middle for the Championship play-off
semi-final first leg in May 2004 when Ipswich Town won 1-0 against the
visiting West Ham.
• Clattenburg has been on the Select List since 2004, the same year he took
charge of the Division Three play-off final between Mansfield Town and
Huddersfield Town at the Millennium Stadium in Cardiff.
• After becoming a FIFA official in 2006 at the age of 31, Clattenburg has
taken control of a number of international and UEFA Champions League
matches.
• Saturday's referee opened the new Barclays Premier League season by
officiating Chelsea's 6-0 home victory over West Bromwich Albion on 14
August. He has also taken charge of three European ties - the UEFA Champions
League qualifiers between Hapoel Tel Aviv and FK Zeljeznicar Sarajevo and FC
Copenhagen and FK Bate Borisov and the UEFA Europa League qualifier between
Galatasaray and Karpaty Lviv.
Next up
• Following the international break, West Ham United will host Barclays
Premier League champions Chelsea at the Boleyn Ground on Saturday 11
September, kick-off 3pm.
• Manchester United will travel to Everton in the Barclays Premier League on
Sunday 12 September, kick-off 1.30pm.

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Avram on Friday
WHUFC.com
Avram Grant has spoken ahead of Saturday's Barclays Premier League trip to
Manchester United
27.08.2010

West Ham United manager Avram Grant has used his pre-match press conference
to urge his side to travel to Manchester United full of confidence on
Saturday afternoon. The Hammers may be the underdogs for the live
ESPN-televised fixture at Old Trafford, but Grant has told his players that
they must believe that they can upset the odds and leave the Theatre of
Dreams with a victory under their belts. The manager also discussed the
signing of Nigeria forward Victor Obinna and his respect for Manchester
United midfielder Paul Scholes.

Avram on Victor Obinna…

Victor Obinna has signed for us and we are very happy. He's a very good
player for us and can play in many forward positions. He is also part of our
plans for the next season to take players who can develop. He has signed on
loan with an option to buy.

Avram on other transfer targets…

I believe we have been linked with a lot of players but I cannot say
anything until we have signed a player. We came here and wanted to change
things and make things better. We have a problem with the financial
situation, as everybody knows, the team is in a lot of debt. We need to
think about this. This is the reason we are taking players on loan with
options - first because it is cheaper and second because it will be good for
us in the future. We can see that. We are looking for players.

Avram on the feeling in the squad ahead of a trip to Manchester United...

You know that it will not be an easy fixture, especially for us who are
trying to get everything more organised and are only at the beginning of a
process. It's not an easy game, but I don't think Manchester United will
have an easy life tomorrow. I say that because I see the players, I see
their development and I see they didn't play well in the first game [at
Aston Villa] but in the second game [against Bolton Wanderers], in my
opinion, they played good football. We deserved to win but there is no
'deserve' in football. I was also pleased with the game in the Carling Cup
[against Oxford United] because they showed, in the psychological side, that
it was not an easy game for us. I see the players in training every day and
I'm confident we can do something. Man United are a good team, yes, but
football is football.

Avram on tightening up defensively before facing Wayne Rooney and Javier
Hernandez...

Man United have top players - not only them but also Dimitar Berbatov and
Paul Scholes, who I think becomes younger every year. They are the best
players, for the moment, in England. They have very good players and a very
good bench, of course. You can see the budget of them too but I believe in
football anything can happen - in football you need to think like this. I
think we showed in the past that anything can happen. One thing I don't want
is for us to give up before the game, nor in the game.

Avram on Paul Scholes returning to the England squad...

I think it would be good for England if it happened and also good for him,
because in my view, to serve your country is a privilege. It is something
that is more than any other thing. His age doesn't matter because he plays
so well. If Paul Scholes was 27 he would be in the squad, so I think someone
needs to speak with him and tell him he is 27-years-old, then he will be in
the squad!

Avram on the number of players retiring from international football...

I'm not surprised because it was happening before. I think I don't like it
because when you are living in a country and are a citizen of a country, you
need to give everything for your country and not think about yourself.

Avram on problems against Aston Villa and Bolton Wanderers...

I think we are a new team with new players. We practised in the training
camp and played very well, but we came to the first game after the
international break with a few injuries. Some, like Thomas Hitzlsperger,
were key players, so we weren't so organised for the first game. This will
not happen when we've had more time together. I can't say anything about the
second game because we played better than I thought. We created a lot of
chances. Football-wise it was a great game, but football is a game of
results. Two direct balls from the goalkeeper and we lost the game. I think
if we continue like this, remember we have a long, long season, I'm positive
we will be OK.

Avram on the importance of team spirit...

One thing that I like to do with my team is always to progress. In Chelsea I
received a team in a situation and we progressed and in Portsmouth it was
the same and in the last two or three months it was good. I think in every
month you will see development.

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U18s bury Boro
WHUFC.com
Robert Hall hit a hat-trick as West Ham United U18s defeated Middlesbrough
5-1 at Little Heath
27.08.2010

Robert Hall was the hat-trick hero as West Ham United Under-18s defeated
Middlesbrough 5-1 to record their first FA Premier Academy League victory of
the season. The England U17 international struck with three clinical
finishes, while Daniel Subuola was also on target. An own-goal from Boro No3
Adam Reach completed the Hammers' scoring at Little Heath. The Friday
afternoon fixture started in rip-roaring fashion, with three goals being
scored in the opening seven minutes. Hall added a third just past the
half-hour mark before second-half goals from Subuola and that boy Hall
ensured Tony Carr's side picked up their first points of the 2010/11
campaign.

In truth, the final tally of six goals was a conservative return for a
pulsating match that the Teessiders played their full part in. Only poor
finishing and a combination of goalkeeper Sam Cowler and his defenders
ensured Boro did not add to Reach's sixth-minute free-kick. "It was a good
win, but to be fair the scoreline could have been more comprehensive," said
Carr. "We could have conceded more goals and we could certainly have had
another two or three ourselves from the opportunities we created. I'm
certainly not complaining, because we're off and running with three points.
"A 5-1 scoreline sounds convincing but it wasn't as convincing as the
scoreline suggests. Middlesbrough played great football with great build-up
play and they missed some good opportunities to be fair. "It was a very open
game - we attacked them and they attacked us. It was end-to-end stuff and
there were lots of goals."

West Ham took just four minutes to go ahead, Hall seeing his cross-shot
deflect off Reach and past Boro goalkeeper Adam Smith. Within two minutes,
the left-back had atoned for his error, catching Sam Cowler off-guard with a
quickly-taken 25-yard free-kick. Carr was angry at his side's lack of
alertness, but that anger turned to joy within a minute as Hall latched on
to Subuola's header before beating his defender and smashing a low shot in
off the far post. Cowler was called into action again on 12 minutes, saving
from Curtis Edwards before Hall and Dominic Vose both worked Smith with low
shots. Hall, who won the UEFA European U17 Championship with England in May,
doubled the hosts' advantage on 31 minutes, completing a superb one-touch
move involving Subuola and Vose with an accurate finish into the corner.
Middlesbrough made two substitutions at the break and the changes briefly
looked like bringing the visitors back into the game, only for Subuola to
kill-off any chances of a comeback on 68 minutes. The striker, who also
scored in the 3-2 opening-day defeat at West Bromwich Albion, showed
composure to latch on to George Moncur's pass and fire under Smith's body.
Two minutes later, Hall completed the scoring in emphatic style, taking
advantage of a slip by a Boro defender to race in on goal from 40 yards out
before smashing an unstoppable shot past the unfortunate goalkeeper. Carr
was pleased with the performance of his star forward, as well as those by a
host of others, including Subuola, Moncur and Republic of Ireland youth
international Eoin Wearen, who shone in central midfield."That's what Robert
is renowned for, he's a good finisher. He got his three goals but he'll be
disappointed that he didn't score one or two more. Danny Subuola chipped in
with a goal again - that's two in two games - and the other was an own-goal
that Robert instigated. "I thought George and Eoin marshalled the midfield
very well, while the younger lads Dominic Vose, Jack Powell and Lamar Hurley
are still learning the game and coming to terms with football at this level.
"They'll get better, they'll get fitter and hopefully we'll move on from
here and look upon this as something of a benchmark for the rest of the
season."

West Ham's U18s return to action on Saturday 4 September, when they travel
to Birmingham City.

West Ham United U18s: Cowler, Driver (Lee 76), Craig, Sanchez (Young 76),
Brown, Hurley, Wearen, Moncur, Vose, Hall, Subuola (Powell 76)
Subs not used: Wootton, Werndly

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Freddie ready to fire
WHUFC.com
Frederic Piquionne is eager to go from goal-provider to goalscorer at Old
Trafford this weekend
27.08.2010

Having scored against Chelsea, Liverpool and Tottenham Hotspur last season,
Frederic Piquionne is aiming to maintain his record of banging them in
against the Barclays Premier League's big guns this weekend. The West Ham
United forward has yet to find the net in three matches since his summer
move from Oympique Lyonnais, but did lay on Scott Parker's last-gasp winner
in Tuesday's 1-0 Carling Cup second-round victory over Oxford United. The
31-year-old passed up a number of presentable chances to open his account
against the League Two side and, with those misses in mind, Piquionne is
determined to score against Manchester United at Old Trafford on Saturday.
Should the France international hit the target, the Hammers will have a
much-improved chance of notching their first league point of the season
following disappointing defeats at the hands of Aston Villa and Bolton
Wanderers. "We are confident, because the first half against Bolton was
very, very good," Piquionne told whufc.com "We just needed to score a goal.
We need to work and we need to learn. I think we will win more games this
year. "I don't know if I'll play on Saturday but if I play, I need to score
because on Tuesday I had five chances but I didn't score. I put the ball in
for Scotty and if I put the ball in for Scotty or for someone else and we
win 1-0, I'll be happy! "When you're a striker, you need to score. I moved
to West Ham and I need to score for the team. I created a few chances and I
think the goals will come."

Piquionne missed out on UEFA Champions League ties against United during
spells with Lyon and AS Monaco and, after finishing on the losing side
against Sir Alex Ferguson's side with Portsmouth last season, the New
Caledonia-born player is eager to get one over the Red Devils. "Manchester
United is a really big game, but we will go there hoping to get a great
result and doing our best for the team. "We know Man U. They have very, very
good players but we also have good players and it's a good game for us.
Maybe we'll get a great result on Saturday."

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West Ham's Obinna Nsofor is 'delighted' by his move
BBC.co.uk
By Oluwashina Okeleji
BBC Sport, Lagos

New West Ham United striker Victor Obinna Nsofor says he is delighted to be
joining a club in the English Premier League. The Super Eagles star, 23, has
signed a one-year loan deal with the Hammers from Inter Milan, although he
is still waiting for a work permit. "I am delighted to be joining West Ham,
a team with a passionate tradition in English football," he told BBC Sport.
"Even though I had offers elsewhere, I preferred England and West Ham. "I am
really looking forward to living in London and playing for one of the
traditional teams in Europe," he said. Nsofor had a successful medical at
Upton Park and has returned to Italy while his work permit is sorted out. A
move to Everton two years ago was prevented after his failure to secure a
permit, but since then he has cemented his place in the Nigerian national
side and Nsofor insists he has come to England at the right time. "The past
is irrelevant but right now the future is what matters, there are talented
players in the [West Ham] squad and I believe I can also bring something
different and positive to the team. "Hopefully, we can just put all the past
games behind, learn from those mistakes and give the fans something to cheer
about." "This is a big platform and opportunity for me as a young player, I
will not let the fans and team-mates down." Nsofor has scored 11 goals in 34
international matches for Nigeria and was an integral part of the side which
won silver at the Beijing Olympics two years ago.

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Man Utd v West Ham
BBC.co.uk
Barclays Premier League
Venue: Old Trafford Date: Saturday, 28 August Kick-off: 1715 BST
Coverage: Live on ESPN, BBC Sport website, BBC Radio 5 live, local radio &
highlights on Match of the Day

TEAM NEWS

Manchester United may rest Paul Scholes and draft Michael Carrick or Ryan
Giggs into central midfield. Wayne Rooney returns after missing the match
with Fulham and will partner Dimitar Berbatov in attack.

West Ham are likely to opt for a five-man midfield, so striker Frederic
Piquionne could give way to midfielder Radoslav Kovac. Matthew Upson should
return to the side after missing the Carling Cup game against Oxford with a
facial injury.

Man Utd
Doubtful:
Injured: Anderson, Ferdinand & Hargreaves (all knee)

West Ham
Injured: Collison, Hines & Kurucz (all knee), Hitzlsperger (thigh)

MATCH PREVIEW
Letting a lead slip twice, squandering a penalty and conceding an 89th
minute equaliser against Fulham last Sunday left Manchester United manager
Sir Alex Ferguson raging, especially as his side missed out on the title
last season by a solitary point. But the Red Devils are a team that never
dwells on a bad result and, on paper, West Ham seem ideal opposition as
Ferguson's side look to play catch up on Chelsea's goal difference that
already stands at +12.
With the Hammers porous at the back, it could also be the perfect chance for
Wayne Rooney to rediscover his goalscoring form. When United played West Ham
back in February, he took his tally to a staggering 27 goals in just 36
matches, but his horror run now stretches to 13 matches and 1081 minutes
without a goal.
Hammers boss Avram Grant faced an insurmountable challenge when he replaced
Paul Hart at crisis club Portsmouth last season, but on the evidence of West
Ham's first three games of the season, he has another serious job on his
hands to install faith in a team that he says carry a lot of "psychology
problems." The Hammers are already off to their worst-ever start to a
Premier League season and captain Scott Parker admitted he is "dreading" the
thought of Saturday's trip to Old Trafford. If that wasn't bad enough, they
then face Chelsea, Stoke away and Tottenham.

MATCH FACTS
Head-to-head
• Man Utd have won their last five matches against West Ham and have scored
14 goals in those games to the Hammers' one.
• The Red Devils dropped just three points from winning positions last
season, which was the fewest in the top flight. West Ham on the other hand
dropped 15.
• West Ham have made 15 visits to Old Trafford in the Premier League, but
have won there just twice, in December 2001 and May 2007.

Man Utd
• Wayne Rooney has failed to score for club and country in 13 matches; his
last goal came against Bayern Munich on 30 March. He has provided just one
assist in Man Utd's last nine league matches.
• The Red Devils have won 11 of their last 12 league matches at Old
Trafford, and have averaged 3.25 goals per game in that period.
• Paul Scholes made 200 passes in United's opening two games of the season,
the highest in the league.

West Ham
• The Hammers are without an away win in the league since the first day of
last season when they beat Wolves 2-0, a run of 19 matches.
• West Ham's last seven league victories all came at Upton Park.
• If he plays, Scott Parker will be making his 250th career league start.
LEADING GOALSCORERS

Man Utd
Berbatov: 2 (1 league)
Includes goals in Community Shield

West Ham
Noble: 1 goal (1 league); Parker: 1 goal (0 league)

MATCH OFFICIALS
Referee: Mark Clattenburg
Assistant referees: Adam Watts & Martin Yerby
Fourth official: Michael Jones

LAST LEAGUE MATCH LINE-UPS
Man Utd (D2-2 v Fulham, a): Van der Sar, O'Shea, Vidic, Jonathan Evans,
Evra, Valencia (Giggs 74), Fletcher, Scholes, Park (Nani 67), Hernandez
(Owen 75), Berbatov. Subs not used: Kuszczak, Smalling, Carrick, Rafael Da
Silva.
West Ham (L1-3 v Bolton, h): Green, Faubert, Gabbidon, Upson (Reid 54),
Ilunga, Dyer (McCarthy 77), Parker, Noble, Barrera, Piquionne, Cole (Sears
86). Subs not used: Stech, Tomkins, Boa Morte, Kovac.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Business not concluded
KUMB.com
Filed: Friday, 27th August 2010
By: Staff Writer

West Ham are expected to be busy right up until the end of the transfer
window as Avram Grant seeks to enhance his squad further. Despite having
made half-a-dozen signings over the course of the summer - including his
most recent capture, Victor Obinna - Grant is hoping to strengthen his first
team squad further - with defensive options now a priority.

The summer transfer window closes at midnight Tuesday, just four days from
now. However the Hammers are still working hard to further enhance a squad
that has lost both its opening games to the new season - with fixtures
against last season's top two, Manchester United and Chelsea to follow.

One player Grant remains extremely keen on is Ivorian full-back Guy Demel,
who currently plys his trade at Hamburg. The 29-year-old right-sided
defender has made more than 100 appearances for the Bundesliga outfit and
with his current contract set to expire shortly, is available at a
knock-down fee.

French-born Demel - who played twice for his adopted country at this
summer's World Cup Finals - has also occasionally played on the right side
of midfield during his career.

Whilst Valon Behrami - who has failed to represent the Hammers thus far this
season - continues to be linked with a move back to Italy, another player
rather more surprisingly set for an Italian job is young full-back Fabio
Daprela.

The 19-year-old left-back impressed in his few outings for the first team
last term and had been considered as one of the club's brightest young
talents. However he is set to be reunited with former technical director
Gianluca Nani at Brescia before the end of the transfer window on a free
transfer.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Under 18s: West Ham Utd 5 Middlesbrough 1
KUMB.com
Filed: Friday, 27th August 2010
By: Staff Writer

West Ham's youngsters went goal crazy at Little Heath this afternoon with a
5-1 demolition of Middlesbrough. A Robert Hall hat-trick saw Tony Carr's
youngsters off to a flyer in their 2010/11 home programme in front of a
healthy crowd at a damp Little Heath. Having been beaten 3-2 in their
opening fixture of the campaign at West Brom last weekend it was imperative
that the young Hammers came back with a good performance this afternoon.
They certainly did that as Hall enhanced his reputation further with his
first treble of the 2010/11 campaign; goals from Daniel Subola and an own
goal completing the rout. Next up for the under 18s - who were watched today
by the likes of reserve team boss Alex Dyer and former midfielder John
Moncur, father of squad member George Moncur - is the trip to Birmingham on
Saturday, 4th September.

West Ham Utd: Cowler, Driver (Lee 76), Craig, Sanchez (Young 76), Brown,
Hurley, Wearen, Moncur, Vose, Hall, Subuola (Powell 76).

Subs not used: Wootton, Werndly

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Gabbidon backs Hammers
Defender knows it is too early to hit the panic button
By Carla Hilton Last updated: 27th August 2010
SSN

Danny Gabbidon insists it is too early to write West Ham off despite their
poor start to the Premier League campaign. The Hammers defender understands
the pressure heaped on Avram Grant in his first season in charge at Upton
Park, especially given that they have lost their first two fixtures. Grant
was expected to bring about a change of fortunes for the side that narrowly
survived under Gianfranco Zola last season but, as yet, he hasn't had the
desired impact. His first two games at the helm have resulted in defeat to
Aston Villa and Bolton, which could prove very costly given that the Hammers
face Manchester United and Chelsea in their next two outings. But Gabbidon
is not worried at this early stage of the season and has assured the fans
that results will improve. Those first six or seven games are really hard,"
Gabbidon told the Daily Star. "It's a tough start but every game is tough in
the Premier League now, so we have to go in to every game believing we can
win."
The Wales international, who is almost back to full fitness after an
injury-ravaged 18-month spell, said he's not hitting the panic button yet.
"There are only two games gone," he said. "We'd have liked more points on
the board, but there's a long way to go, and we can't get too worried, too
early."

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Man Utd v West Ham preview
Red Devils aim to pile misery on Hammers
Last updated: 27th August 2010
SSN

PREDICTIONS:
Skysports.com prediction: 4-1
One to Watch: Dimitar Berbatov

MATCH FACTS
United have won their last five games against the Hammers. United are 1/7 to
win again tomorrow. Bet now

Wayne Rooney scored three goals over the two meetings with West Ham last
season, including two at Old Trafford. Rooney is 9/4 to score the first goal
of tomorrow's game. Bet now

Paul Scholes has made the most passes in the Premier League this season:
200. Scholes is 7/2 to score anytime tomorrow. Bet now

West Ham face a daunting trip to Old Trafford as they look to get their
first points on the board. While the Hammers have made a dismal start to the
campaign, Manchester United'sencouraging early form has been overshadowed by
the goalscoring exploits of main title rivals Chelsea. The Red Devils came
out on top against Chelsea in the Community Shield before cruising to a 3-0
victory over Newcastle in their Premier League opener. However, they were
held to a 2-2 draw by Fulham last weekend after twice surrendering the lead
and will now be determined to return to winning ways. Sir Alex Ferguson will
at least be able to recall Wayne Rooney, who missed out at Craven Cottage
due to a stomach bug but has trained all week. Ferguson has no fresh injury
worries to consider following the match against Fulham and has revealed that
Rio Ferdinand and Anderson could soon be back in action. Ferdinand has
returned to training after recovering from the knee problem that ruled him
out of the World Cup, while Anderson (cruciate ligament) played for the
reserves this week.

West Ham news

West Ham could not have asked for a tougher test after losing their first
two games of the season and, with Chelsea to come next weekend, supporters
may already be fearing the prospect of a long relegation battle. Having
played poorly in the 3-0 defeat to Aston Villa, there were some positive
signs in terms of performance against Bolton last Saturday. However, an
impressive first-half showing counted for nothing as the Hammers capitulated
after the interval and the lack of confidence spilled over into the Carling
Cup clash on Tuesday. West Ham laboured for 90 minutes against
newly-promoted League Two outfit Oxford before a last-gasp Scott Parker goal
sealed their place in the next round. Avram Grant will be starting to feel
the pressure just three matches into his reign as manager and may decide to
make changes for the journey north. Defence will be the main area of concern
after conceding six goals so far, and Grant will hope to have Matthew Upson
back from the knock that forced him off against Bolton. Summer signing
Thomas Hitzlsperger is still sidelined with the injury he sustained on
international duty, while Jack Collison (knee) is a long-term absentee.

Possible starting XIs
Manchester United: Van der Sar, O'Shea, Evans, Vidic, Evra, Valencia,
Scholes, Parker, Nani, Rooney, Berbatov.

West Ham: Green, Ben-Haim, Tomkins, Upson, Ilunga, Faubert, Parker, Noble,
Barrera, Cole, Piquionne.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Hammers bid for Wilson
West Ham join race to sign coveted Pompey defender
Last updated: 27th August 2010
SSN

Sky Sports News understands that West Ham have entered the race to sign
Portsmouth captain Marc Wilson. The 23-year-old defender is subject to
interest from a number of top-flight sides, with West Brom having already
had a £3million bid turned down. Fulham are also keen, while Stoke are
thought to be lining up a player-plus-cash deal for the defender - with Dave
Kitson and Liam Lawrence discussing moves in the opposite direction -
estimated to be worth around £3.5m. But Avram Grant's West Ham have now also
made an approach, as they are eager to shore up a leaky defence which has
already conceded six goals in their opening two Premier League defeats.
Pompey boss Steve Cotterill previously admitting he would be powerless to
prevent Wilson leaving Fratton Park if the club receive the right offer.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Paul so selfish raps Grant
The Sun
By VIKKI ORVICE
Published: Today

AVRAM GRANT has accused Paul Scholes of letting his country down by being
selfish. The West Ham boss insists the Manchester United star should still
be pulling on an England shirt. Midfielder Scholes, 35, claims he has no
intention of going back on his 2004 decision to retire. He snubbed the
chance to play in the World Cup after a late offer and now plans to ignore
calls for him to play in the Euro 2012 qualifiers. Former Israel chief
Grant, who takes his team to Old Trafford today, said: "I've been a national
coach and to serve your country is a privilege. That is more important than
anything else. "I'm not surprised so many players are retiring when they
could still play but I don't like it. "When you are living in a country, you
need to give everything for your country and not think about yourself."
Grant has never beaten United away but added: "If you don't take any
difficult situation as a challenge then you don't succeed. Not in sport or
in life."

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Hammers dismiss loan move for Behrami
Published 17:38 27/08/10 By James Nursey
The Mirror

West Ham have blasted Roma after they requested to take Valon Behrami on
loan. The Hammers are keen to offload Swiss international midfielder
Behrami, 25, to generate funds for new signings. But Italian Serie A outfit
Roma have refused to meet the star's £3million price tag. "Roma's idea of a
loan is a joke," fumed a Hammers' official. West Ham look set to be one of
the busiest clubs before the window shuts. They are juggling over 10
potential deals in a bid to land at least three or four targets after
signing Milan's Victor Obinna..

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Fergie backs Rooney to end goal drought
Published 23:00 27/08/10 By David McDonnell
The Mirror

Wayne Rooney returns for Manchester United today, determined to end the
worst goalscoring drought of his playing career. Rooney, who has gone 13
games - a total of 1,081 minutes - without a goal for club and country,
missed United's 2-2 draw at Fulham last weekend after picking up a virus.
But United's star striker has been training all week and, according to Old
Trafford insiders, is desperate to get back among the goals and embark on
one of his customary scoring streaks. "Wayne has trained all week and he's
back, which is good news," said Fergie. "I say it time and time again -
strikers live by their goals. When they're not scoring, they think it's
never going to come. "Then when the goals do come, they think they're never
going to finish. Strikers are straightforward people, you know. And Wayne is
no different from any other striker."

Rooney's last goal came on 30 March, against Bayern Munich in a Champions
League quarter-final. That was 150 days ago, since when he has played 492
minutes for United and 589 for England, which included his own personal
nightmare at the World Cup.

Despite an impressive 45-minute display in the 3-1 Community Shield win over
Chelsea, in which Rooney set up the opening goal and played with his
customary zeal, the 24-year-old looked devoid of confidence in United's
Premier League opener this season, a 3-0 win over Newcastle.

Rooney was substituted with 27 minutes left and, while he is still searching
for match fitness having reported back for pre-season later than those
United players who were not on World Cup duty in South Africa, there is
legitimate concern as his ongoing failure to find the back of the net.

His previous worst run without a goal, prior to the present one, stretched
for 12 games - 1,002 minutes of match-time - from December 2005 to February
2006, which came to and end with two goals in the Carling Cup final against
Wigan.

One United player with no such concerns over his form is Paul Scholes, whose
early-season displays have once again prompted England boss Fabio Capello to
implore him to come out of international retirement for the Euro 2012
qualifiers.

Fergie, as Scholes confirmed on United's pre-season tour of the US, said
there was no chance the 35-year-old would pull on an England shirt again,
having made his decision to retire in the aftermath of Euro 2004, having
become disillusioned with the international scene.

And Fergie then rounded on Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger who, amid praise for
Scholes, claimed last week there was a "dark side" to the midfielder - a
notoriously poor tackler - that the Arsenal boss did not like.

"I don't know why Arsene Wenger said that," said Fergie. "If you're asked
about someone with the ability and performance levels of Paul, you know he's
not the best tackler, but he's not injured anyone in his time here.

"It's very easy to look into the dark side of any player. I could say the
same about one of the Arsenal players in particular, but I don't need to do
that. He [Wenger] should focus on the strengths and abilities of someone
like Paul and the contribution he's made to English football over an 18-year
period. It's phenomenal."

Fergie claimed Scholes - and fellow veteran Ryan Giggs - had every chance of
emulating AC Milan legend Paolo Maldini by playing at the highest level when
they are 40. Scholes turns 36 in November, while Giggs is 37 later the same
month.

"I think the fact Paul has stayed clear of injuries is important," said
Fergie. "He had an eye and a knee injury a couple of years back, which cost
him two half-seasons. But he's fit now and trained every day. That makes a
difference when you're in your 30s.

"Maldini was unbelievable. He was 40 when he finished. So it can be done. It
depends on how much Giggs and Scholes enjoy it, and whether they stay clear
of injuries. Paul is more susceptible to injuries than Ryan, but if he stays
clear he has a chance."

Ferguson confirmed that Scholes will not be coming out of international
retirement to play for England, and will be less than impressed that West
Ham boss Avram Grant believes the United midfielder is letting down his
country.

Grant carried out national service in the Israeli army before managing his
national team and before visiting Old Trafford today, the proud patriot
insisted Scholes should also serve his country and return to the England
team.

He said: "Because I was a national coach and to serve your country is a
privilege. It is more than any other thing. His age doesn't matter because
he is playing so well.

"I am not surprised by his retirement because it has happened before but I
don't like it because when you are living in a country and a citizen of the
country, you need to give everything for your country and not think about
yourself."

West Ham travel to Old Trafford after losing their two opening league
matches for the first time in a decade. But Grant, who lost his first and
last matches for Chelsea against Manchester United, insisted: "I always tell
my players to be positive. You cannot go with a negative attitude.
Manchester United are a better team than West Ham but it's not always the
better team that wins."

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Man Utd v WEST HAM: Victor Obinna could feature while Matthew Upson set for
return
By SPORTSMAIL REPORTER Last updated at 5:11 PM on 27th August 2010
Daily Mail

West Ham are waiting to discover whether they can include new signing Victor
Obinna in their squad for the Barclays Premier League clash with Manchester
United. England internationals Carlton Cole, Robert Green and Kieron Dyer
are all set to return after being rested for the Carling Cup win over
Oxford.
Manager Avram Grant is hopeful Matthew Upson will also be fit after he
suffered a blow to the face in the 3-1 defeat to Bolton, though he also has
Tal Ben Haim and Manuel Da Costa pushing for selection at the back.
Midfielder Thomas Hitzlsperger remains out with a thigh injury.

Team (from): Green, Stech, Upson, Tomkins, Ilunga, Ben Haim, Gabbidon,
Spector, Da Costa, Reid, Daprela, Noble, Parker, Kovac, Barrera, Faubert,
Boa Morte, Dyer, McCarthy, Sears, Nouble, Stanislas, Piquionne, Cole,
McCarthy, Obinna.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Hammers and Blues chase Trezeguet - agent
By Soccernet staff
August 27, 2010
ESPN

The agent of former France international David Trezeguet claims Birmingham
and West Ham are both interested in signing his client from Juventus.
Trezeguet, 32, is expected to leave the Bianconeri before the close of the
transfer window and has been linked with all manner of clubs in recent
weeks.
Juventus' all-time record foreign goalscorer, with 172 goals to his name, is
reported to be close to joining promoted Spanish side Hercules, but a move
to the Premier League may yet be a possibility. "I think tomorrow [Saturday]
will be a decisive day," Antonio Caliendo told Tuttomercatoweb.com. "Lazio?
He will not go there because Juventus don't want to sell him to an Italian
team. Zaragoza, West Ham and Birmingham are interested though." Juventus
have sold Diego to Wolfsburg and lost striker Amauri to injury recently, but
the Serie A giants are expected to strengthen their squad with the loan
addition of Napoli forward Fabio Quagliarella.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Avram Grant admits Scott Parker may still leave West Ham for Tottenham
Lucrative offer for midfielder may tempt Upton Park board
Striker Victor Obinna arrives on loan from Internazionale
Jamie Jackson
guardian.co.uk, Friday 27 August 2010 22.30 BST

Avram Grant is confident that with only four days left until the transfer
window shuts Scott Parker wants to stay, although the West Ham United
manager accepts there is an outside chance the midfielder may leave for
Tottenham Hotspur. Grant confirmed that the Nigeria forward Victor Obinna
has signed on a season's loan from Internazionale.

Spurs' qualification for the Champions League group stages this week
heightened the requirement for Harry Redknapp to add depth to his squad and
the manager retains an interest in signing Parker, having had an £8m bid
rejected earlier this summer.

West Ham have continually said Parker is not for sale. If a lucrative offer
was made for the 29-year-old, which David Gold and David Sullivan, the
owners, accepted, it would leave Grant struggling to replace the midfielder
before the transfer deadline on Tuesday.

When this was put to the Israeli he said: "We didn't think about any other
situation. Because of [new] players like Obinna, [Pablo] Barrera and Winston
Reid they need experience [around them] here in the Premier League and we
agreed they need a player like Scott Parker. But in football anything can
happen."

Parker is yet to sign the improved deal that was offered to him earlier this
month. Grant said: "As far as I know the club wants him [to stay] for a
long, long time and Scott wants to stay here so he's part of our project for
the next year. We are looking to develop young players and we also need
players like Scott. There are not many like Scott here."

West Ham have lost their opening two league fixtures and face a difficult
trip to Manchester United tomorrow, followed by the visit of Chelsea
following the international break. Defeat to the champions of the last two
seasons is a real possibility, raising the spectre of the club reaching
mid-September without a point.

Grant said: "It's a big challenge and the players need to look at it like
that. If you don't take any hard situation as a challenge you cannot
succeed. Not in sport and not in life. Manchester United are a better team
than West Ham but it's not always the better team that wins. We need to do a
few things to make life not easy for them."

Regarding Obinna, who is on a season-long loan and played for Nigeria in the
World Cup, Grant said: "He's quick, young [23], he has the qualities which
are good for us because we needed quicker players in [our] forwards."

Grant would not be drawn on speculation that he hopes to sign David
Trezeguet from Juventus but did say he is still in the market for another
striker, and a right-back.

He added: "I cannot answer about Trezeguet or others. There are a few areas
that we don't have players at all so this [forward and right-back] is our
first priority. But in any position if there are players that can be good
for us [we are interested] because we have a long season."

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Alan Smith: nullifying elusive Paul Scholes is West Ham's first priority
For West Ham to stand any chance of keeping Manchester United quiet on
Saturday, they simply have to clamp down on the man of the moment, Paul
Scholes.
Telegraph.co.uk
By Alan Smith
Published: 11:00PM BST 27 Aug 2010

If this ingenious passer of the ball is allowed time and space he'll have
the visitors chasing shadows all over Old Trafford. It goes without saying
that you need to get tight on Scholes, but that's easier said than done when
Sir Alex Ferguson's side starts hitting top gear. Their speed of movement
and passing is such that opponents tend to lose shape and get ragged, so
creating more room as the match wears on. It happened to Newcastle on the
opening day, while Fulham, though they played well, couldn't stop Scholes
from scoring last week. It's a challenge, however, that should suit the
determined Scott Parker, patrolling central midfield with Mark Noble and,
perhaps, Radoslav Kovac. Between them, they've got to decide when to get
tight on Scholes and when to stay goalside. Because if you're not in a
position to get there quickly enough, the little maestro is brilliant at
knocking the ball off first time as you approach and taking the return
around the other side. As a result, you are out of the game and he can be at
your back four, looking for angles to find a way through.
Mind you, the alternative can be equally destructive. Wayne Rooney might be
struggling for goals at the moment but he retains a great understanding with
his visionary team-mate. While that can play out in a number of ways, a
favourite for Rooney is running off the back of his centre-half as the ball
rolls towards Scholes, knowing that his mate will have spotted the run.
As a rule, Scholes's first-time diagonal pass is usually right on the money,
giving Rooney a chance of getting in. In those circumstances, Matthew Upson
and Danny Gabbidon will have to be very alert in making sure they don't step
in front of the striker. Better to give themselves a yard, just as the pass
is struck.
It's important, too, that the full-back on that side tucks in to give his
centre-half cover. Rooney represents the main danger at that point, not the
wide man, who can be left with more space. Yet none of this is easy,
especially for a team that has defended so poorly in their opening two
league games. Scholes could be set for another enjoyable day.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
West Ham chief Brady: Everyone so pleased for fit-again Dyer
28.08.10 | tribalfootball.com

West Ham United vice-chairman Karren Brady admits Kieron Dyer's recovery
this season has put a smile on everyone's face. Dyer is threatening to get
back to his best after an injury-plagued time with the Hammers. In her diary
for The Sun, Karren wrote: "Kieron Dyer has been told to pack it in more
times than a boxer with a scrambled brain. "Yet he comes back punching again
against Bolton after a year of pain and frustration. He has been three years
with this club and has not finished a match, though he managed 77 minutes
without a setback this time. "I have been very much with him in spirit since
I asked Neil McDarmid, who set up his own clinic after 15 years with us as
physio at Birmingham City, to see what he could do about reducing a lump of
scar tissue in his leg. "It was never-say-Dyer as Kieron worked the whole
summer away. Yes, I know his whopping wage must have been an incentive. But
there are quite a few who, with his history, would have lazed away his final
season under contract - taken the money and walked, when you think about it.
"But he did not.
"He has worked incredibly hard and been absolutely determined to get fit.
Now he just might prove to be a tremendous asset to us. I sent a text to
Neil, the best in the land at his job, after the game to thank him and to
tell him to send me his bill. "He replied: 'No invoice. You looked after me
for 15 years, so I'm just delighted he's playing for you and for him.' "I
must say I was really touched. My faith in football is immediately
replenished ten-fold."

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Neil 'Razor' Ruddock
The former Liverpool and Spurs footballer on wearing jodhpurs but no undies,
every hole being a goal and Stan Collymore's angel fetish
Barry Glendenning guardian.co.uk, Friday 27 August 2010 07.00 BST

Putting up 126lbs overweight, Neil Ruddock ...
Hello Neil. Hello Small Talk.

Do you mind if we call you Razor? You can call me anything you want, mate.

You're talking to us on the blower, Razor, so you must be looking for a
plug. Get on with it. Well I'm out at Kempton Park where I've just been
riding in a horse race to promote Betfair and ...

[Interrupting] A what? A horse race. Betfair got a few of us "legends"
representing Arsenal, Liverpool, Manchester City, Manchester United and
Chelsea up on horses, with each representing one of the teams in their Five
Horse Race and ...

[Interrupting again] So you were riding on a horse? Yes.

In a race? Yes. [Laughs] Why do you sound so surprised?

Was it a very, very big horse? A shire horse? Have the RSPCA been informed?
What exactly are you driving at here, Small Talk?

Nothing. Did you have to weigh in beforehand, like a proper jockey? We did.
We were all dolled up in our silks and jodhpurs and jockey hats ... the
works.

And what did you tip the scales at? That's a very personal question. Suffice
to say, the clerk of the scales looked very surprised.

How many people did it take to leg you up on this unfortunate mount of
yours? They found me a ladder. Well, a chair.

So, talk us through the race. Well, if the teams finish the Premier League
in the same order the horses representing them finished, Manchester City
will be champions. Steve Lomas was first past the post for them, Kerry Dixon
was next for Chelsea, I came with a late surge to finish third for Liverpool
and David May and Ray Parlour made up the numbers for Manchester United and
Arsenal.

And Spurs? Did they fall the first or do a Devon Loch near the end? They
were a non-runner today, for some reason!

Footballers on horses, a leading betting exchange, it smells suspiciously
like a cheap publicity stunt to Small Talk. Ah, it's just a bit of fun,
innit? Although myself and Ray Parlour decided we'd better have a bet on
those teams finishing the league in that order, because we'd be gutted if
they did and we hadn't.

Small Talk mentioned to our office administrator that we'd be talking to you
today and she said she used to fancy you when you were younger. Did you get
a lot of female attention? What do you mean she used to fancy me?

Past tense, Razor. She's moved on.

Is she there?

She is, yes.

Hand her the phone, I want to talk to her.

OK, just a second.

[There's a short interlude as Small Talk hands the phone to a mortified
colleague who begins what seems like a pleasant enough, if one-sided chat
with an indignant Razor. He's doing all the talking as she giggles at first,
then suddenly grimaces with thinly diguised revulsion and hands back the
phone, holding it like a crusty sock Small Talk's mother has just found
under our bed.]

That seemed to go well, what did you say to her? I told her that if she
could see me in my jodhpurs with no undies on, her passion for me would be
rekindled.
Small Talk is a family questionnaire, try to keep it above the waist. Sorry
about that mate, but I do look good [laughs].

You've always seemed like a man who enjoys life, on and off the pitch. Is
that a fair comment? Well, you got to, ain't ya? I was only talking about
this to somebody the other day, saying that the only time you see
footballers with a smile on their face these days is when they score. When I
was playing around the same time as Vinnie Jones and Dennis Wise you used to
be able to have a laugh with away fans; stick your fingers up at them when
they were calling you names and all that.

But football's a very serious business, Razor. Or so they say. I think it's
got way too serious now. Obviously you want to play well and win things, but
you've got to enjoy yourself too. That's the reason people play the game in
the first place - for enjoyment. Just because you happen to be good enough
to become a professional, it don't mean all the fun has to go out of it.

Since retiring you've been pretty game for a laugh, hanging around the
jungle on I'm A Celebrity ... Get Me Out Of Here, enjoying domestic harmony
in Celebrity Wife Swap. Yeah, I've done loads of things on TV that have been
a good laugh. It pays the wages too, y'know what I mean? I weren't on
£180,000 a week, more's the pity.

Would £180,000 per week be enough to coax you back into the jungle with
Peter Andre and Jordan? Woah ... that might just do it, but it'd be tough. I
haven't watched one of their TV shows since because two weeks in the jungle
with Jordan was really wearing.

You were also married to Pete Burns for a week on Celebrity Wife Swap. Thank
you very much for reminding me.

How did you and Pete rub along together, so to speak? We got on like a house
on fire [laughs]. Nah, Pete Burns is quite a nice man. He's a bit
antii-establishment when he's on camera, but apart from that he's alright.
But I had to barricade me bedroom door with the wardrobe every night, just
in case.

Were you tempted to get it on with him? Y'know, away from the missus like
you were, a man has needs. Look, I know every hole's a goal and all that,
but seriously, Pete Burns just isn't my type. I know you shouldn't knock it
til you've tried it, but I prefer the blonde with small lips.

You came across as being a bit of a neanderthal on Celebrity Wife Swap. Have
you been shamed into changing your ways? [Unconvincingly] Yeah, I think I
have a bit, but they made me look bad on that. It was cut wrong! They edited
it all wrong! [Laughs] But I do try a little bit harder around the house
these days. Me and the missus have two kids now, so I have to do my bit.

You did a bit of coaching at Swindon. Have you been tempted to give that
another bash? Well, I've got me coaching badges, but that whole experience
left a bit of a sour taste in my mouth, so while it might be something I go
back to in the future, I'm young and can pick and choose what I want to do
at the moment and I'm happy enough with that. I like being my own boss.
What sports do you play apart from football? Golf. I love me golf. I play
off four.

What's the last CD you bought? I bought a Matt Monro album three days ago.
It's brilliant.

Matt who? You don't know Matt Monro?

Nope. Really? [Bursts into song and sounds surprisingly good] "BORN FREE! AS
FREE AS THE WIND BLOWS! AS FREE AS THE GRASS GROWS! BORN FREE TO FOLLOW YOUR
HEART" It's great stuff, mate.

Thanks for that Razor. The last sportsman to sing down the phone to Small
Talk was cricket's Paul Collingwood, giving a rousing rendition of Sex on
Fire by Kings of Leon. Collingwood? Really? Matt Monro is better, though.

And you're a much better crooner than Collingwood, not least because you
don't sing in a Sunderland accent. Well I have actually been on Celebrity
Stars In Their Eyes where I came second. I was Neil Diamond and I lost to a
fucking Dingle off Emmerdale Farm. Can you believe that?

All to well, Razor. Those Dingles are always up to no good. Her uncle Zak
probably rigged the voting. Which Neil Diamond song did you sing? Small
Talk's guessing Forever In Blue Jeans. No mate, it was Song Sung Blue.
[Bursts into song again] "SONG SUNG BLUE, EVERYBODY KNOWS ONE. SONG SUNG
BLUE, EVERY GARDEN GROWS ONE!"

Are you the best footballer to come out of the London borough of Wandsworth?
I think so, yeah, but there's only me Frank Bruno and Jimmy White, that I'm
aware of in sporting terms.

Gordon Ramsay lives there and he likes to pretend he played for Rangers.
Does Ramsey live there? Don't tell me that. You've ruined Wandsworth for me
now. He's Scottish anyway, so he doesn't count. Ah mate ... I can't believe
you've ruined Wandsworth.

Sorry about that. When you were at Liverpool, you got dropped for the 1996
FA Cup final ... for Phil Babb. Does that still upset you? Yes. Of course it
does. Growing up as a kid, that's what you live for, innit? It's what every
kid who plays football wants to do - play in an FA Cup final, and to have
that opportunity taken away hurt. But that's life, innit? You just roll with
the punches and get on with things.

Do you still have your white Armani suit from that day? No. Me and Stan
Collymore climbed the statue of Eros in Picadilly Circus that night and I
draped mine over the angel. I thought she looked cold.

According to his autobiography, that's not the only mischief Stan got up to
that night. He claims he went back to the hotel and had it off with the then
Liverpool manager's daughter. [Laughing] I know ... you could say Eros
wasn't the only little angel Stan clambered up on that night!

[Laughing] You're a bad man, Razor. Thanks for your time. No problem Small
Talk.

• Neil Ruddock was representing Liverpool in the Betfair Five Horse Race at
Kempton Park racecourse. Betfair hosted a horse race with football legends
riding horses representing the five leading contenders for the Premier
League in a bid to predict who might win the title race this coming season.
For all the action from the day visit www.betfairfootball.com.

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